“I beg you, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”
― Rainer Maria Rilke
The day I was born my mother developed a severe ringing in her ears. It got so bad she had tubes put in but they didn’t work and eventually just fell out. The thing was, they would only ring when she was around me. I don’t believe there is a medical definition for this but she read somewhere that when your ears ring it is often the voice of angels trying to speak to you in a language you aren’t yet able to receive or understand. Personally, I call it obnoxious. When I got old enough to speak the ringing stopped. My mother had no idea what she was in for raising me, but quickly adapted to expecting the unexpected.
This is the introduction to my story and how I came to meet Dr. Sara Hazel and become affiliated with Stone and Sage Apothecary. It is also the story of how gemstone energy medicine was added to the science fiction status of my already somewhat unpredictable and bizarre life (in the best way possible). As my mother often says, “You just can’t make this shit up.”
When I was in 5th grade a girl at my school started to call me Claire. I kept telling her that was not my name but she was insistent, seeming almost confused when I tried to correct her. She would scream it across the playground, greeting me that way, even writing it in my yearbook. It was as if she knew something I didn’t know about myself.
Claire, as in clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience, clairolfaction, claircognizance, clairgustance. I did not understand these terms until I was much older. The faster way to say this is “Psychic” but the word has always felt a bit kitschy to me, bordering on using aluminum foil as bubble gum sort of experience. When you spend your days and nights seeing and hearing spirits and watching the past and future flash before you like a late night infomercial marathon I suppose you have to call yourself something. Just by way of explaining things.
So, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Sydney, but feel free to call me Claire, I suppose I couldn’t stop you anyway. I am the resident “psychic” but the Stone and Sage clan has dubbed me the Elven Princess. [Editorial Note from the rest us: because she can barely survive the chaotic energies of city life, thrives in wild places, talks to animals and plants and they talk back, care-takes all creatures from slugs to snakes to seagulls, shoots arrows from a bow, and –you get the idea]
Important things to know about me before you read any further, a disclaimer if you will (cue the bullet points!):
I figure we should start with a topic that crosses multiple lifetimes, infinite space and various dimensions (occasionally all at once) and go from there… Obviously I’m talking about gemstones…
Every little kid wishes they had super powers. They dream about magic and fantastical scenarios that society quickly labels as fiction or delusions. They don capes and costumes and fly around the front yard and shoot bugs with invisible laser beams.
Being born with an array of psychic tendencies does not help calm this childhood scenario. Rather, the reverse. As a child you don’t know that your experience of the world is not something other people are aware of. Enter chaos stage left. It’s a heavy and confusing reality to comprehend, understanding just how different you are. You go from wishing you could fly to wishing you could trade in your version of a super power (all that psychic Claire business) for anonymity or normalcy.
There were so many weird things in life that seem normal to me now. Seeing spirits, dreaming about future events and then watching them unfold, witnessing the shifting energy patterns of subtle energy bodies as a person moves through the world. Even hearing people’s thoughts and emotions. But one thing I feared for a lot of years was gemstones.
Now to be clear this was not a full fledged fear. It was a fear of respect. I understood that I was too sensitive to their strong energies and respected the raw power innately stored within them. As a child I would always beg for a bag of tumbled “rocks” in the gift shops because they felt like magic. As an adult I felt out of control anywhere near them. I felt as if I were sticking my finger into a light socket and waiting to pass out from the voltage.
I tried all kinds of variations of using gems in my life. Raw gems, tumbled gems, carved gems. Perhaps it had to do with the type of gems? I wondered. I desperately wanted to feel “blissed” out like all the people I kept seeing surrounding themselves with crystals and dream catchers but I would simply and literally lock up.
As an example, during a reiki session someone once set a huge quartz crystal on my chest without warning me. This sent me into convulsions, literally. My back arched and my arms and legs curled as if I were having a seizure. As someone who actually has epilepsy, I was less than thrilled.
In another instance I was in a store where a woman handed me a giant raw chunk of fluorite and my hand involuntarily locked around it and threatened to stay locked. She had to literally pry my fingers off of it…. So, I gave up. After all, it takes all kinds right? Maybe gems were not one of my kind.
Fast forward through a series of unfortunate events that had left me psychically, emotionally and spiritually a little rough around the edges and somewhat desperate for a deeply profound healing experience and gemstones decided to make another entrance. This happened to be after one of the occasions where I had dismantled my life and was once again attempting to start from scratch.
I had found myself leaving San Diego and driving through the desert in June towards a nudist resort in northern Phoenix, Arizona… Yes, there is a story there but that’s (perhaps) for another time… Much too vivid for an introduction blog… Just so…so very vivid…
Anyway, there I was in the desert questioning my life choices and decision making skills and I heard a very clear voice, “You have to go to Phoenix.”
You see, I had made an agreement with the Universe just a week prior that I would stop fighting it’s “flow” and do what it told me from now on without argument. The first thing it told me to do was go to nudist resort in the freaking desert in June… *sigh*
All right, all right. So I went.
Now as it happens, there I met a beautiful naturopathic physician (not at the resort, mind you) and two weeks later I became a Phoenix resident. 120 degrees Fahrenheit seemed reasonably manageable with a beautiful woman. Meeting Diane brought all kinds of enlightening new experiences and people into my world.
One day she asked me to go with her to Sedona while she was assisting a workshop on gemstone energy medicine. She explained that one of her medical school mentors was hosting and teaching this workshop and was a total “wizard” when it came to nature cure and energy medicine. She thought the whole gig would be right up my alley. I kindly let her know I had no interest in the woo woo gemstone workshop madness but that I would love to roam around Sedona. So I agreed to join.
After the first night she returned to the hotel room with a small collection of round, smooth gemstones. They had a shape, purity and quality that I had never seen before. I was pretty confused as to why they looked like marbles and I was no longer really open minded at that point, as I said.
Our romance was still new enough that her cuteness was sufficient bribery. She talked me into putting small poppy jasper gems on the bottom of both my feet as an experiment. Suddenly I felt as if there were vines slowly crawling up my legs and making their way over my entire body. Not scary vines, but an undeniable Earth energy that was essentially and quite vividly infusing my physical body with pure energy…
Good news was it wasn’t a bad experience. Bad news was I was not going to be able to sleep anytime soon. Coffee has got nothing on Poppy Jasper’s stimulating effects...
I was starting to settle into this experience and was enjoying the energy with my eyes closed, trying to find my “vibe” and feeling proud of my reclaimed gemstone open mindedness. Next thing I knew she was waving a cluster of quartz spheres over my chest, (seems to be a thing for me….), and I immediately felt my solar plexus flex in, expand out 10 feet in every direction and then I was suddenly spinning through various dimensions and layers of both myself and the world in a way that I can only assume would get a rave fiction review were I to ever adequately describe it.
Was there now a gaping hole in my chest extending down to the core of the Earth?
I was literally afraid to look down and check.
No big deal.
But I had to ask, “Honey, is there a hole in my chest?”
Diane immediately froze and became wide eyed…. “Uh….no? Maybe?” she said, “I don’t know what that means. Did I break you? I think it would be best if you meet Dr. Hazel tomorrow. She will know what to do with you.” And she slowly put the quartz spheres away and began moving away from me like maybe I was a live grenade or something.
Now I try to not negate my experiences and allow them to be whatever they are, but I have to say this experience shook me. Like, picked me up by my pinky toes and swung me around like a helicopter -- shook me. I absolutely could not deny the power in these gems and there was something different about them. They felt more intentional, more controlled. Well…not the quartz situation exactly, but that was specific to me and my weirdness perhaps. The language I heard from them was more familiar in a way. I could literally hear them talking. Do they talk? Is that a thing? Am I officially schizophrenic now? That would be new. These were all very legitimate questions.
I felt my curiosity starting to wrestle with my animosity. If there was a way to intentionally focus the energy of gemstones so that the delivery wasn’t so chaotic…. well that could potentially be my kind of thing.
The next day I arrived at the end of the class and entered Dr. Hazel’s house where she was having the seminar for naturopathic medical students. I looked around and saw people with their feet in giant bowls of different round smooth gems, others were holding them over other people. Some people had them taped on various parts of their body. I was a little unsure of what rabbit hole I had just fallen down.
Dr. Hazel walked into the room from the hallway and came to a halt with a surprised, “Well, hello! Welcome!” Diane briefly explained the experience with the quartz on my solar plexus the previous night, wondering what had happened and if we should be worried. Dr. Hazel laughed and looked at me in a way that felt similar to when you go through the full body X-ray machines at the airport and you know someone you don’t know is seeing parts of you that you yourself haven’t even seen…except less awkward and without the risk of radiation exposure.
“Oh shit”, I thought. “This woman can actually SEE me.” By this I mean the parts of me that I keep hidden for safekeeping. Even that psychic stuff that I don’t go waving around in public. (There is an etiquette rule similar to this at the nudist camp but again that’s a story for another time.) ”Hmmm.” she said still staring. “I see. You’re a special kind of creature aren’t you?” Admittedly, I’ve been called worse.
Dr. Hazel would go on to become a friend and mentor of sorts at the behest of Diane who was searching for answers regarding my seizures, which seemed to be energetic in nature and required a different approach (i.e. I needed to be taught by someone that not only understood my unique set of gifts but would consider them in their relation to my health and not as a mental disease)
Her office was conveniently located across the parking lot from the office I was working in at the time. One day she asked me to come over because she had a gift for me. Now, Dr. Hazel had already proven to me that she was an exceptional doctor but also incredibly advanced in the realm of energy work and subtle body medicine. So when she handed me a small white round gemstone half the size of a pea I was only PARTLY skeptical…
It was a very small Mother of Pearl gemstone. A gem that literally nurtures and cradles the nervous system like a mother rocking their restless child to sleep. I was willing to try anything if it meant freedom from my seizures. She instructed me to tape it onto a specific spot on my sternum. This was basically an acupuncture point that is integral to the nervous system and sends calming messages quickly throughout the body.
The first night I tried it I fell fast asleep within two minutes, sleeping harder and deeper than I had in years…. It was….AMAZING! Like most modalities and therapies, quality is of utmost importance as is the knowledge of how to use the healing tool safely and effectively. I finally felt I had the right teacher for the job.
She encouraged me to listen to them and allow my own abilities to create an almost symbiotic flow of information. I learned that the gemstones are both ancient and wise. I learned that they themselves have their own set of guardians, which watch over them and help guide humanity’s hands with their use. Most importantly, I learned that their job is not to do the healing for us. They are our teachers. They REMIND us of what we are capable of doing for ourselves. They are mirrors to our imbalances and temporary crutches until we regain our strength.
I began using gemstones in my private practice and saw incredible results! Emotional releases and transformations, physical healing and spiritual growth beyond anything I had ever expected. What was most amazing to me back then and still to this day is their guidance. They would tell me what to do next; I just had to be willing to listen.
If you had told me 5 years ago that part of my daily life would involve gemstones I would have laughed at you. Wearing and using them now is as normal as putting on clothes or taking vitamins. They have become guests in my home and guides within my life. So here we all are. The Stone and Sage tribe. Brought together through lifetimes of karma and a compulsion to teach others and try and bring some light into this often-chaotic world. Stone and Sage Apothecary is part website blog, magic bus, educational venue and the culmination of many unique individual journeys colliding into a unified cause. We are hoping to reach out in all directions and create a community of people devoted to living their healthiest and happiest lives.
I invite you to keep in touch with us and stick around! If history is any indication, our adventures are only going to get more interesting from here.